Mad World
by Turtle Kid the Woolgatherer
Summary: A songfic of Rath right before Tetheus and Ruwalk decide the Dragon Knights must go to Kainaldia. Don't own the song. [Giftfic for SnapDrag21]


Disclaimer: I don't own Dragon Knights

* * *

**_All around me are familiar faces,_**

**_Worn out places,_**

**_Worn out faces._**

Nobody would let him get out. All he wanted to do was hunt demons. There was nothing wrong in that.

They made it seem like such a big deal.

Every day he saw the same faces, all looking the same way.

He could understand that they were worried about Cesia, and about Nadil, but the least they could do was let him out to get her.

**_Bright and early for their daily races,_**

**_Going nowhere,_**

**_Going nowhere._**

They were all trying to act brave, but it was useless.

They would not tell him he was the heir, but he knew.

How many things they didn't know was uncertain.

It was sad to think that nobody but him, Rune, and Thatz would leave the castle to do anything. The fact that he still blamed himself for the death of so many was insane, it was Nadil, after all, but Rath couldn't help it.

**_The tears are filling up their glasses,_**

**_No expression,_**

**_No expression._**

He had a feeling that Lykouleon was crying some nights.

Not that the lord showed it, but with Raseleane impregnated with Nadil's child, it was a wonder he hadn't gone off the deep end.

He barely ever smiled anymore, the lord, like him.

_This event has changed us all._

Rath ignored at that thought.

**_Hide my head I wanna drown my sorrow,_**

**_No tomorrow,_**

**_No tomorrow._**

Rath just wanted to go.

No more tomorrow, or yesterday, or now, just death.

But . . .

Cesia needed to be rescued.

Besides, she was the only one he could stand, as well as being the only sane one out of all the castle.

She did hate him, after all.

**_And I find it kinda funny,_**

**_I find it kinda sad,_**

**_The dreams in which I'm dying _**

**_Are the best I've ever had._**

**_I find it hard to tell you,_**

**_I find it hard to take._**

**_When people run in circles_**

**_It's a very, very_**

Cesia hadn't believed it at first, that he wanted to die. That the thought actually _pleased_ him.

She came around.

It had been weird when for Rath when he had dreams of when his head was cut off, sure that this had to be untrue.

Soon he hadn't cared, going into them was a pleasure. Dying felt nice, simply floating away, not caring.

The thought used to scare him. Not anymore.

**_Mad world . . ._**

**_Mad world . . ._**

Living in this kingdom, where people were insane to love him, was mad.

Absolutely lunatic in thought and action.

Not that he had a choice with fire.

_I should never have made him bond with me._

**_Children waiting for the day they feel good,_**

**_Happy birthday,_**

**_Happy birthday._**

He didn't have an official birthday, being created by Kharl, but Raseleane always threw at least a small party for him once a year.

That never made Rath feel good, reminding him of when he killed Left Bird, and he cried blood.

But then he'd had no choice.

They'd been splitting him apart.

**_Wanna feel the way that every child should,_**

**_Sit and listen,_**

**_Sit and listen,_**

Most children were happy, but after that incident, all innocence he should have retained was gone.

After that the _only _pleasure was demon hunting, but no.

He'd been made to sit and read, now a favorite pastime. Those books told him stuff he would need to know, and he blamed the books for giving him the idea to kiss Cesia to make her change back.

For all the trouble, all he got was a mouthful of fur, and no change in her form, whatsoever.

**_Went to school and I was very nervous,_**

**_No one knew me,_**

**_No one knew me._**

Raseleane taught him at the castle his letters, a good thing to know to read.

He just couldn't help but feel she didn't know anything about him, when she taught him.

She treated him like she regularly did, even after the incident.

Sometimes, Rath thought Kai-Stern hadn't told them the whole story, or the true story.

But he had.

**_Hello teacher tell me what's my lesson,_**

**_Look right through me,_**

**_Look right through me._**

Rath asked his teacher things he thought he should know about demons, and the state of the castle, and Kharl.

She either told him little, or nothing. Occasionally even Raseleane had no idea.

That puzzled him.

**_And I find it kinda funny,_**

**_I find it kinda sad,_**

**_The dreams in which I'm dying _**

**_Are the best I've ever had._**

**_I find it hard to tell you,_**

**_I find it hard to take,_**

**_When people run in circles_**

**_It's a very, very_**

It was sort of funny the way he wanted to die, when most would give anything to live.

They just never had to live in this hellhole.

It was definitely funny when people ran around, looking for him. Sometimes he hadn't even left, and just watched from a nearby tree as people ran off in different directions, thinking they would hate him once they learned of his deceit and then he could be happy.

They just kept loving him.

**_Mad world . . ._**

**_Mad world . . ._**

**_Enlarging your world . . ._**

**_Mad world. . . ._**

This was such a large world.

A mad world, one might say, if you realized such things like love.

Hadn't Gil killed Fiji? Yet he loved her.

Hadn't he killed Alfeegi? Yet Alfeegi had loved him.

What about when people stopped Rath from killing himself, or from expanding his world and killing demons at the same time. Did they truly love him when they stopped him from doing what _he_ loved time after time?

Maybe they just loved who he might become.

"Does the Dragon Tribe really need her? How important is she? Tell me the truth."

Thatz and Rune stared at him. The slight pause made Rath nervous.

"Stop it," Thatz said with a serious expression on his face. "You're just looking for an excuse." Rath looked surprised, and slightly confused. "You want a reason to go after Cesia."

Rath blushed.


End file.
